We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Dr. Mel Borins' Funny Medical Songs

by Mel Borins

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $7 USD  or more

     

1.
If you're between the ages of 50 and 74 have a mammogram every two years
2.
Pap Rap 01:43
PAP RAP (MEL BORINS/MITCH GIRIO/SANDY BUCHMAN) PAP TIME Hey, hey, prevent Ca, get your Pap test right away Once you’re 21 and you have sex, it’s time to check out your cervix Pap smear every three years, get the test and have no fear See your Doc, right away, get the Pap, prevent Ca PAP RAP RAP PAP PAP RAP RAP PAP Genital warts, HPV , then you’re at risk for the big C Age 35 to 69 then you’re at risk, it’s Pap smear time. If you’re 70 with 3 Paps that are clear then you don’t need another smear Your MD will want to see that your cervix looks cancer free PAP RAP RAP PAP PAP RAP RAP PAP Hey, hey, prevent Ca, get your Pap test right away NO PART OF THIS SONG MAY BE DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT CONSENT OF MEL BORINS COPYRIGHT 2012
3.
COLON CANCER CHECK (Mel Borins/ Mitch Girio/ Sandy Buchman) (ALL RIGHTS RESERVED) Get your butt to your Doc And have yourself a talk Get your butt to your Doc And have yourself a talk About the Colon Cancer Check Call it poo, number 2, call it crap, call it anything you like catch colon cancer early It could save your life If you’re between the age of 50 and 74 You should test every 2 years Don’t wait anymore Your Doc will tell you what to do with your poo Your Doc will tell you what to do Your Doc will fax the lab to send you the FIT kit You poop onto the collection paper You stick the FIT stick into the poo, baby Then drop it off to the lab 9 out of 10 people can be cured, baby A simple test can save the day (the crap kit can save your life) Colon cancer can be beat-eat, baby See your MD right away Get your butt to your Doc And have yourself a talk Get your butt to your Doc And have yourself a talk Get your butt to your Doc And have yourself a talk About the Colon Cancer Check NO PART OF THIS SONG MAY BE DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT CONSENT OF MEL BORINS COPYRIGHT 2011
4.
Hypertension 04:05
HYPERTENSION (ALL RIGHTS RESERVED) (MEL BORINS/ MITCH GIRIO) There’s a secret, You’ve got a secret, That your body’s not telling you. Hypertension, Did I mention, A silent killer’s stalking you. CHORUS Your heart’s grown more than twice its size, The pressure builds in the arteries in your eyes What a strange surprise When you realize you’ve died. It’s not a joke, When you have a stroke. If your hand goes weak, And you find it hard to speak, You may be having a T.I.A. If your head aches, Then for heaven sakes, Measure your blood pressure right away. CHORUS Your heart’s grown more than twice its size, The pressure builds in the arteries in your eyes What a strange surprise When you realize you’ve died. BRIDGE Lose the weight, Exercise, Protect your kidneys and your eyes. Halt the salt, Trim the fat, You don’t want a heart attack. It’s not a joke, When you croak. Don’t forget to measure, Your blood pressure, It’s the only way to know if it’s high. And if it’s raised, Take pills each day, You really don’t want to die. CHORUS Your heart’s grown more than twice its size, The pressure builds in the arteries in your eyes What a strange surprise When you realize you’ve died. NO PART OF THIS SONG MAY BE DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT CONSENT OF MEL BORINS COPYRIGHT 2006
5.
6.
FAT IN MY BLOOD BLUES (MEL BORINS M.D.) (ALL RIGHTS RESERVED) Cholesterol is high. HDL‘s too low LDL’s too high. So is my ratio. I‘ve got hyperlipidemia. I’ve got hypercholesterolemia. I‘ve got hypertriglyceridemia. Fat in my blood blues. My pappy died when he was forty three, He had so many clogged arteries, Doctor said this could happen to me. Take these pills Here, take these pills. Throw away the pork and beans, No more butter no more cream, I used to fry But now I am cooking with steam. Casue I I got hyperlipidemia I ‘ve got hypertriglyceridemia I’ve got hypercholesterolemia Fat in my blood blues. I got so many risk factors Doctor thinks I should take ……. So glad my muscle don’t ache. Lab says my liver enzymes are great. Fish oils and niacin Exercise and becoming thin Time I took one of those statins. Cause I‘ve got hyperlipidemia. I’ve got hypercholesterolemia. I‘ve got hypertriglyceridemia. Fat in my blood blues. I’ve got hypercholesterolemia. Fat in my blood blues. NO PART OF THIS SONG MAY BE DISTRIBUTED WITHOUT CONSENT OF MEL BORINS COPYRIGHT 2008
7.
8.

about

Music and laughter are wonderful way to get people’s attention and educate them about important issues. When things are learned with humor they are learned well. I have created these funny medical songs as a way of teaching some important messages in health care.

Dr. David Feinstein, an endocrinologist in Dallas Texas has had the song Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis on his website for years and the feedback he receives from his patients has been tremendous. Canadian Hypertension Education Program and Cancer Care Ontario have licensed the rights to use some of these songs for educational and promotion purposes.

We would be glad to provide these songs to any organizations that might wish to use them for marketing or education. Any enquiries regarding the licensing of these songs should be sent to administrator@melborins.com.

Please visit www.melborinscreative.com to learn more about my creative activities.

credits

released October 23, 2012

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Mel Borins Toronto, Ontario

Mel started playing guitar when he was 16. When in High School and University he played in coffee houses, parties and talent shows and anywhere that would have him. He started writing songs in High School. His songs are varied. Folk, rock, country, rap, comedy, children's. Music is a way of sharing his innermost thoughts and feelings. Listen and let him know what you think. ... more

contact / help

Contact Mel Borins

Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

If you like Mel Borins, you may also like: